


Adventures in Retail

by Arbryna



Category: Lost Girl
Genre: Curtain Fic, F/F, Fluff, One Shot, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-23
Updated: 2013-06-23
Packaged: 2017-12-15 20:43:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/853855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arbryna/pseuds/Arbryna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bo and Lauren drag Tamsin out to buy curtains for their new place. Kenzi comes along for the ride.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Adventures in Retail

**Author's Note:**

> Based on a tumblr prompt from simplesetgo.

Tamsin is in hell.

At least, if such a place existed, she's pretty sure it would be something like this. The aisles are way too close together, with shelves overflowing with every kind of useless shit imaginable, and everywhere she looks there are people shoveling crap into their carts like they'll die if everything in their damn house doesn't have the exact same designer color scheme. It's all so pathetically human. 

Of course, that's the downside to dating both a human and a succubus who grew up in the human world: having to put up with this kind of banal shit when she'd much rather be sitting back in their plush new living room with a bottle of vodka and a girlfriend on either side. Not that she's a cuddler or anything. 

"Ooh, check it out." 

Oh yeah, can't forget the human best friend. Sometimes Tamsin wonders how the hell she ended up here. 

" _Tres_ redneck chic," Kenzi says, holding up what looks like a shot glass styled after those stupid red disposable cups. The entire display is filled with products in the same vein, from goblets to outdoor string lights. The shit people come up with, seriously. 

Tamsin rolls her eyes, but before she can deliver a caustic quip about how there must be some kind of fae that feeds off of the energy of people who have nothing better to do than think of shit like this, a middle-aged woman shoves past her, intent on getting to the scented candles before anyone else. She grits her teeth, clenches her fists, and tries to remind herself why it would be a bad thing to attack a human in broad daylight, in public. "Remind me again why I agreed to do this?"

Warm hands slide around Tamsin's waist from behind, and she doesn't need to look to know it's Bo pressing against her back. "Because Lauren's place is too small for the three of us," Bo says, dropping a kiss onto Tamsin's shoulder, "and the clubhouse is apparently not good enough for you anymore." 

"And because Bo threatened to lock up the vag," Kenzi offers helpfully. Tamsin glares at her, mostly because she's right and damn if that doesn't work every fucking time. Kenzi throws her hands up defensively. "What? Like I _wanted_ to know that shit?"

"Okay, we all agreed the crack shack has seen better days," Tamsin points out, opting to pretend Kenzi never spoke. "And all I said was we should find a new place, like one with walls. I never said I wanted to pick out china patterns." 

"Curtains, babe." Bo slides around to walk beside Tamsin, keeping one arm slung around her hips. "It's just curtains. And maybe some sheets, since our last set were kind of destroyed." 

Tamsin eyes Bo skeptically. "That was all you." 

"If I recall correctly, you were involved in that little adventure as well," Lauren remarks, pushing a cart up behind them. 

The memory gives Tamsin's mood a little boost; she smirks at Lauren, remembering the events leading up to the sheet destruction. "You would have been too if you'd been there." 

"Okay, we can stop with the succu-sexcapades," Kenzi says with an exaggerated shudder. "It's bad enough I had to hear it for so long. I'm scarred for life. Thank the fae gods or whatever that Hale's place is quieter." 

"Yeah, that's what you like about it," Bo teases. "I'm sure it has nothing to do with your own nightly adventures." 

"Ew, how would you even know that?" Kenzi's eyes go wide, and she sets down the red Lego-shaped alarm clock she was examining. "We're close, Bobalicious, but not _that_ close." 

"I can read auras, remember?" Bo raises an eyebrow. "If you weren't getting it on a daily basis, yours would have overheated by now with the energy between you two." 

While Kenzi shakes her head like she's trying to forget the last few seconds of her life, Tamsin takes advantage of the lull in conversation, sliding her arm around Bo's shoulders and leaning in to murmur into her ear. "You know, we could be at home right now, working off some energy of our own."

"Mm." Bo bites her lip, and for a second Tamsin thinks she might actually be considering it. When she turns her head, though, it's to place a painfully chaste kiss on Tamsin's cheek. "Maybe later," she says with a teasing grin. "If you behave."

An excited squeal draws their attention to the wall of kitchen accessories, where Kenzi is fawning over some kind of black silicone thing. "Okay," she says, holding it up as they approach—it turns out to be a mold that makes ice cubes in the shape of skulls and crossbones. "If I'm going to be coming over to partake in your liquor, as we all know I am wont to do, this is an absolute necessity." 

Bo shakes her head, rolls her eyes. "Four years, and she still doesn't grasp the meaning of the word 'necessity'." Chuckling, she pulls away from Tamsin and meanders farther down the aisle.

"You're with me, right TamTam?" Kenzi says, turning a beseeching gaze to Tamsin and holding up her prize like a kid with a coveted toy. "Booze is an essential staple of the home."

"Booze, yes. Dumbass accessories? Not so much." Tamsin narrows her eyes, giving Kenzi her best intimidating glare without using her powers. "And if you call me that again I will hurt you no matter who your boyfriend is." 

Ignoring the threat, Kenzi rolls her eyes. "Fine. I'll get it for Hale," she sniffs, holding the ice cube tray to her chest. "He'll appreciate my _ah_ -mazing sense of style." 

Down the aisle, Bo is inexplicably fascinated by the utensils—particularly the long, slotted spatula she's holding. She smacks the flat of it against her hand, raising an eyebrow appreciatively at the effect. 

Kenzi groans. "BoBo, we all know you don't cook. Stop perving on the kitchenware."

Bo huffs, but puts the spatula back nonetheless. As she and Kenzi wander ahead, Tamsin grabs the utensil in question off of the rack. Lauren gives Tamsin a look as she approaches the cart with it. 

"What?" Tamsin says with a smirk, letting her free hand linger at the small of Lauren's back as she slips the spatula into the cart. "It could be fun."

Lauren shakes her head, chuckling fondly. "I thought just dating Bo was a challenge. I don't know how I keep up with the two of you."

Tamsin slides behind Lauren, trapping her by putting both hands on the cart handle. "I haven't heard any complaints." 

Smiling, Lauren leans back into Tamsin. "Mm, well I'm not crazy." 

"Seriously," Tamsin says, shifting to the side so it's easier for both of them to walk. She gestures to the abundance of appliances they're passing. "All this just for some damn curtains? The internet exists for a reason." 

"It's not the same," Lauren replies. Her eyes seek out Bo, who's checking out some clearance display of kitschy home decor, and a smile touches her lips. "You know Bo. Once she gets an idea into her head, there's no talking her out of it."

"Oh please," Tamsin scoffs. "You're just as into all this domestic shit as she is."

"Maybe," Lauren admits with a sheepish shrug. When she looks back at Tamsin, there's a mischievous glint in her eyes. "But the sooner we pick out the curtains, the sooner we get to the sheets."

Now _that_ could be fun. "Ooh, Doc, you know just what to say to me."

After what seems like the longest journey of Tamsin's life, they finally reach the labyrinth of curtain displays. Lauren sets out immediately, examining fabric and pricing and whatever other kind of shit one considers when buying curtains (Tamsin's never bought curtains in her life—they kinda would have been a driving hazard in her truck). Kenzi follows, no doubt intent on finding something obnoxious to test Hale's patience with. Tamsin stays with the cart, eyeing the whole scene dubiously. 

Bo slides her hands up Tamsin's chest, locking them behind her head. "I know this isn't really your thing."

"What was your first clue?" Tamsin retorts. Her hands settle on Bo's hips. 

Rolling her eyes, Bo tugs Tamsin down for a quick kiss. "This is the first real home you've had in centuries," she says, her gaze open and earnest. "I just think it's important for you to have a say in how it looks."

Damn it. Bo _would_ pull this thoughtful, emotional shit in public. Tamsin shuts her eyes, swallows around the lump forming in her throat. She's been trying not to think about the fact that she's _settling down_ , that she actually feels like she belongs somewhere for the first time in—well, maybe ever. If only she had some booze to help her with this. "You know I don't care about that shit, Bo," she says when she opens her eyes. "You're there, and Lauren. It doesn't matter what the place looks like." 

A brilliant smile spreads across Bo's face. "You say the sweetest things, valkyrie," she says, leaning up to place a lingering kiss on Tamsin's lips. She pulls back, rests her forehead against Tamsin's. "But you're not getting out of this that easily." 

Tamsin groans. "I'm sure whatever you two pick will be fine."

"Just try," Bo pleads, letting her hands slide down to Tamsin's shoulders. "For me?" When Tamsin still hedges, an evil glint appears in chocolate brown eyes. "If you don't, I'll let Kenzi pick them out." 

Horrified, Tamsin finally concedes. "Fine," she huffs. "Let's look at some damn curtains."


End file.
